3 Weeks Home and My Baby's Back!

It is unreal to think that we have been home for 3 weeks. It seems like just yesterday I was fretting about flights and packing and freaking out but yet it seems like Mari and I have been together forever. I thought I would miss some aspects of my old life...laying on the couch with no one to worry about, eating when I wanted, only doing laundry once a week, etc. I don't miss any of that...it just seems natural knowing that there is someone else in the house, someone that needs me. I'm surprised that I have adapted so well to that...I was worried that the "24/7" part of the deal would be the hardest. Thankfully, I was wrong. The only thing I miss so far is the ease of going places...today we ran errands, several which involved literally driving across the street from the last one. What a pain to have to get in and out of a car seat (yes, a carrier type seat would be ideal for this but why invest in something that she will outgrow very quickly). It is also quite a challenge to shop for groceries with an infant...it is getting a little easier since she can sit up better--our first couple trips to the grocery store, I had to keep one hand on her while shopping...let go and kaboom!

So anyway, in my last post I alluded to the fact that Miss Mari was a little cranky. I thought the "honeymoon" was over. The "honeymoon" in adoption is classified as a period where the kids are super good and easygoing because they are afraid that their new situation is not permanent. Once they feel comfortable that they are staying put in a secure environment, then they test their limits and bring out their "other side." I thought this only applied to older kids until this weekend. Mari was very cranky the last two days (I should preface this my saying this is a proportional crankiness because she is never fussy, so her moodiness is probably very mild compared to a lot of other 10 month olds--but it was a big personality change). She would not giggle, barely smiled, wouldn't talk, didn't want to be held but didn't want to be let go of, etc. etc. She was just starting to snuggle and enjoy rocking before this change and then this weekend, she went back to her old ways of arching her back and pulling away from me, often only getting solace by lying quietly in her crib having "alone time." This is hard to know what to do...should I give in to the "alone time" because this seems to encourage the independence and discourage the "need" for me. Or should I force her to stay with me until she calms down, encouraging the "need" to have me help her but possibly building resentment. I'm kind of just meeting her in the middle. If she is only slightly fussy and resistent, then I wrap her up tight and try to calm her down; if she is all-out screaming and arching away, then I give her alone time. She has lived the last 9 months calming herself, getting herself to sleep, and feeding herself (at least the last couple months)...I think it is perfectly natural to need some alone time. She has never in her life had 1-on-1 attention for 24-7 and it is probably overwhelming. Last night, we got so tired of each other's crankiness that I packed her up at dinner time and heading to my parent's house. She enjoyed the change of scenery and faces, I enjoyed a home-cooked meal. We both left happier.

Enough of my dissertation on "Jill's take on the post-adoption cranky temper-tantrums."

With all that being said, the personality switched back today. My giggly, sweet, funny chatterbox is back. I should mention that we were having some problems with constipation (boy does she plug up easy!) that are resolved. She never acted like she was sick or in pain but I'm guessing she wasn't feeling as well as she could have. Nothing like a good poop (or 6 or 8) to make you feel better. Sorry for the poop stories...just trying to keep up with the Mumblerrrs! I should probably defend myself here (since I'm a nurse and should understand these things better) and mention that Mari has prunes every morning for breakfast and straight, undiluted pear juice 1-2 times a day. I think it was the addition of bananas to our menu right after carrots that did it...we moved on to peaches and are back on track. It seems that the key to pooping is eating "P's"...prunes, peas, pears, peaches. Green beans are also good and, per my pediatrician, ground up Wendy's chili (we haven't resorted to that...we want poop, not explosions!).

So Mari is back to being cute and cuddly. She ate fine all day without her post-feeding tantrums that had returned. She ate 5 veggie puffs without my help and didn't choke on any of them (okay, she ate 4 and the other one just disintegrated in her hand). She might have said "kitty-cat." We were playing with the cats and I was saying "kitty-cat" over and over and she whispered "tit-tat" and laughed! I'm taking it. Our first words..."tit-tat."

She also tried a new trick...she was on her hands and knees and straightened her legs so that her butt was up in the air and her weight on her toes. Very impressive given the fact that she has no interest in standing up. She did enjoy herself when I showed her how to stand up in her crib holding onto the side rails...probably not too smart on my part but oh well.

I think that is all that is new. We are gearing up to head to KY this weekend to visit family (as long as the weather holds). Usually, travelling with an infant for the first time is a daunting task...after spending a week in Ethiopia with an infant I had never seen before (not to mention being a first time parent and having to take everything with me) I am not too frightened. There are at least 100 Wal-Marts between here and there, should I forget anything!